She was mean and she had seashells in her hair! (dollsome) wrote,
She was mean and she had seashells in her hair!
dollsome

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Friday Night's Alright (For Dating) (Kelly/Andy)

Title: Friday Night's Alright (For Dating)
Pairing(s): Kelly/Andy, Jim/Pam
Spoilers: through "The Job"
Word Count: 3,752
Rating: PG
Summary: Kelly sets Andy up on a blind date with a friend. Things don't quite go according to plan. Also, there's lots of instant messaging.
Author's Note: Ahhh, it was nice to delve back into the world of Kandy. It's been awhile, y'all! I figured I had to finish off the summer with at least one more.

All of the IM'ing going on in this one was inspired by the lovely and charming Expressions in Emoticons by ladama23.

Also, everyone should go see Stardust, because it is truly the new greatest movie in my life. I kid you not.




kkapoor says:
hey!

abernard says:
aloha, fair lady

kkapoor says:
what are you doing friday night?

abernard says:
if I told you, I’d have to kill you

abernard says:
why?

abernard says:
are we getting our high school musical 2 on?

abernard says:
fiiiiiinally, btw

kkapoor says:
no

kkapoor says:
it’s date nite, duh.

abernard says:
SRSLY??/

abernard says:
KLAJEWROIAWEUFOIWEUPAEWOIUJ;;;;

abernard says:
sorry

abernard says:
finger slipped

abernard says:
caps lock’s a b*tch

abernard says:
anyway

abernard says:
srsly?

kkapoor says:
yeah...

kkapoor says:
i totally mentioned it to you didn’t i?

kkapoor says:
(and dont freak out or anything, i totally tivod HSM2. we're good to go)

abernard says:
noooo

abernard says:
you didn't mention it

abernard says:
however i forgive you

abernard says:
wow

abernard says:
i can't believe it

kkapoor says:
believe what?

abernard says:
that this is finally happening

abernard says:
cuz i'd be lying if i said i hadn't been thinking about it

abernard says:
for a really

abernard says:
really

abernard says:
reeeeeeally

abernard says:
long time

abernard says:
and finally it's actually happening for real

kkapoor says:
high school musical 2??

abernard says:
no

abernard says:
date nite

abernard says:
(and hsm2, of course )

kkapoor says:
you're actually excited about it?

abernard says:
well

abernard says:
yeah

kkapoor says:
oh andy your'e so awesome

kkapoor says:
i totally thought you might freak out or something

abernard says:
nooooooooo

abernard says:
no

abernard says:
no

abernard says:
not at all

abernard says:
why would i freak out?

kkapoor says:
well most people can be such spazzes about blind dates

abernard says:
blind dates?

kkapoor says:
yeah

kkapoor says:
but of course you'd be totally cool

kkapoor says:
i shouldn't have worried

abernard says:
explain to me again

abernard says:
how this is a blind date

kkapoor says:
i could have sworn i told you

kkapoor says:
my bff jill and i decided we should all go out to dinner & a movie friday

kkapoor says:
and she's bringing a guy from HER work to set up with me

kkapoor says:
and i'm bringinng a guy from MY work to set up with her

kkapoor says:
and that's you

kkapoor says:
get it?

abernard says:
oh yeah....

abernard says:
got it

abernard says:
totally

kkapoor says:
and you're in right?

abernard says:
totally in

abernard says:
always

kkapoor says:
yay!!!1

kkapoor says:
oh andy

kkapoor says:
you are so the best

kkapoor says:
<3 <3 <3

kkapoor says:
youre totally like the will to my grace or something

abernard says:
gladly ms. kapoor

abernard says:
except

abernard says:
i'm not gay

abernard says:
you do know i'm not gay right?

kkapoor says:
duh

kkapoor says:
why else would i set you up with jill?

abernard says:
lol, just checking

abernard says:
hey

abernard says:
brb

kkapoor says:
kay! <3

--

pbeesly says:
Hey

jhalpert says:
oh, not you again.

jhalpert says:
how many times do i have to tell you, pam?

jhalpert says:
i'm tired of being harassed by your sexually aggressive smiley faces

jhalpert says:
can't you tell them i'm seeing somebody?

pbeesly says:
Not a chance

pbeesly says:
But that's not important right now

jhalpert says:
oh pam

jhalpert says:
that's ALWAYS important

pbeesly says:
Shut up for a minute, speedy fingers

jhalpert says:
speedy fingers?

jhalpert says:
you cut me to the core, beesly

jhalpert says:
to the core

pbeesly says:
Shhhhhh.

pbeesly says:
Was Andy crying just now?

jhalpert says:
yikes, was he?

jhalpert says:
i was kind of distracted

pbeesly says:
Oh really?

jhalpert says:
yeah

jhalpert says:
you see, my new desk, which also happens to be my old desk, ensures that i have the greatest view of the distractingly pretty receptionist.

pbeesly says:
You don't say

jhalpert says:
i DO say

jhalpert says:
also, i've been systematically tossing paperclips onto dwight's desk every time he blinks.

pbeesly says:
Oooh

pbeesly says:
Multitasker

jhalpert says:
i know.

jhalpert says:
attractive, right?

pbeesly says:
Very

pbeesly says:
Anyway, I think you should go see what's up with Andy.

jhalpert says:
why don't you go?

pbeesly says:
Gee, I dunno

pbeesly says:
Because it's the men's room, maybe?

jhalpert says:
wow

jhalpert says:
i can't argue for a second with your ingenious logic.

pbeesly says:
Yeah, I figured.

jhalpert says:
and me checking up on andy-

jhalpert says:
this would be because i'm concerned about his well-being right?

jhalpert says:
and not, say, because of the comedic value of our buddy drew weeping many (very manly) tears?

pbeesly says:
Of course

pbeesly says:
It's because we care

jhalpert says:
about secretly laughing at him.

pbeesly says:
Well, yeah

pbeesly says:
But he doesn't have to know that

jhalpert says:
oooh

jhalpert says:
she's crafty.

pbeesly says:
Get out of here, Halpert.

jhalpert says:
right away.

pbeesly says:


jhalpert says:
scarlet woman


--

"Hey, Andy," Jim says, stepping into the bathroom. Andy's standing at the sink, face buried in one hand. "You okay, man?"

"Oh, yeah," Andy says, and sniffles. "Totally."

"You sure you're not--" Jim pauses thoughtfully. "I dunno -- crying?"

"Pfft!" Andy manages to scoff and sob at the same time, which is impressive. "No."

"Oh," Jim says. "Okay."

"No worries, Big Tuna," Andy continues, his voice thick with poorly suppressed emotion. "Just . . . something in my eye."

"Like a tear?" Jim suggests.

"Noooo," Andy says ardently. "Not like a tear. Like a -- speck of . . . something . . . allergy-related. As opposed to emotion . . . -related."

"Ah," Jim says, wincing sympathetically. "That's tough."

"Yeah," Andy says, leaning forward to press his forehead against the bathroom mirror. "Yeah, I'd say so." He inhales steeply, then chokes out, "I'd say it was pretty freaking tough."

"Um, Andy?" Jim says, shuffling slightly. He's so uncomfortable that he's not even sure he can let himself be amused. "Are you sure I can't -- y'know, do something to make you feel better?"

"Like what?" Andy asks, turning slightly to face Jim. He's still plastered tragically against the bathroom mirror.

Like leave.

"Like," Jim says bravely, "we could talk about it."

"Oh, please," Andy says, and scoffs bitterly. "Like Big Tuna knows anything about wasting away for the love of a woman who won't give him the time of day." He meets his own eyes woefully in the mirror, and lets out a shuddering breath.

"Actually," Jim says, "kinda been there."

"Yeah, right," Andy scowls.

"Seriously," Jim says. "I really, really have."

Andy seems to contemplate this for a moment before looking all the way over at Jim, abandoning the tormented mirror-leaning and all.

"Are you still there?" he asks. His eyes are really wide and hopeful, and Jim suddenly feels like he's talking to a kid.

A kid with really crappy taste in ties.

"No," Jim says -- kind of gently, which is scary in and of itself. "Now, I'm doin' pretty good."

"How'd you manage that?" Andy asks, wiping his eyes roughly on his right sleeve.

"Maybe you should just tell her how you feel," Jim suggests, because it’s easier than answering the question.

"Is that what you did?" Andy persists.

"Um," Jim says, and decides it's probably best to skip the months of miscommunication and decent girlfriends with really crappy luck caught in the crossfire. "Yeah."

"Maybe I will," Andy says. He sniffles, then takes a lunging step forward to grip Jim's shoulder. "Thanks, Tuna."

"No problem, Andy," Jim says solemnly, and reaches over awkwardly to pat his hand.

Andy gives him a watery, pathetic smile before pulling his hand back.

"Whooo," he exhales, shaking his head. The sound echoes faintly around them, and his eyes light up. "Hey," he says, with that part-fifties-sitcom-character-part-serial-killer grin that makes him Andy. It's a whole lot less unnerving. "The acoustics in here are kickass." His teeth seem to glint manically. "Heyyy, Tunaaa. Are you thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?"

Jim mercifully partakes in one round of The Lion Sleeps Tonight.

--

pbeesly says:
So, what's up?

jhalpert says:
nothing much

pbeesly says:
Really?

pbeesly says:
He didn't get kicked out of his acapella group or anything?

jhalpert says:
nope

jhalpert says:
just some allergies

pbeesly says:
Aw

pbeesly says:
Disappointing.

jhalpert says:
totally.

jhalpert says:
so

jhalpert says:
i'm thinking of trying to win the heart of the gorgeous receptionist.

jhalpert says:
any pointers?

pbeesly says:
Hmm

pbeesly says:
Let's see . . .

--

Friday night rolls 'round, and they meet Jill and Nicholas at Chili's, since it's apparently the only existing restaurant in Scranton or whatever. Kelly knows she looks great because Andy's eyes almost fell out when he showed up at her apartment, and he kissed her hand twice on the way out the door. Sometimes, she's like 97% sure he's her favourite person in the world.

Except Ryan Seacrest.

And Violet Affleck.

Nicholas is just as cute as Jill described, which is awesome. He looks a whole lot like Lindsay Lohan's love interest from Mean Girls, only not underage and everything. The point is, his hair falls into his face in this totally adorable messy-on-purpose way, and she finds her fingers itching to brush it back right away. It's a good sign, she figures; immediate physical attraction is a total sign of being meant to be. Plus, he's got this dreamy crooked smile.

Jill has been telling her for like a month that he’s way better for her than Ryan could ever be, because he doesn’t look like a vampire nerd. Kelly still thinks this is a little unfair to Ryan, even if he is the world’s biggest jerk, because it’s not like looks were the issue with their relationship.

And besides, some vampire nerd-looking guys can be totally cute. Like the Mac guy.

Still, Jill has promised her like a dozen times that Nicholas is way nicer than Ryan, even though she’s never really gone into specifics about his personality beyond there.

That’s okay. Kelly likes surprises.

"I love the name Nicholas," she tells him as soon as they’ve all squeezed into the booth at Chili’s.

"Thanks," he says, dreamy-smiling at her.

"Can I call you Nicky?" she asks, resting her hand lightly against his forearm.

"I’d rather you didn’t,” he says apologetically. “I kinda hate nicknames, sorry.”

"Oh," she says, and makes sure her smile doesn’t waver. "Okay. That’s totally cool."

Meanwhile, Andy is totally cracking Jill up with his imitation of the Russian eyepatch-wearing guy on Lost, which makes sense because it's hilarious. Kelly's a little relieved, honestly: she gets that Andy's wonderful in like fifteen different ways, but it seems like most people don't, and Jill can be kind of a bitch. So it's good that she gets why Andy is awesome. This way, they'll all be having fun tonight.

"Do you watch Lost?" she asks Nicky— Nicholas.

"Nah," he says. "It's kind of geeky, isn't it?"

"Well, yeah," Kelly admits, feeling a little like he kicked her in the shin emotionally. "But in a cool way. Like everyone in the whole United States is geeky about it, which makes it a cool kind of geeky. Get it?"

"Yeah," Nicholas says. "I think I see what you're saying."

"Speaking of geeky-cool stuff," she continues brightly, because she’s not gonna let the fact that he clearly has sucky taste in TV depress her too much. Love is about compromise. "High School Musical 2 finally aired this week. I've totally got it on TiVo at home. I'm so excited. You've heard of it, right?"

"Yeah, my . . . niece likes that," he replies slowly. "She's twelve."

"That's so cool," Kelly says, beaming. "You should totally introduce us sometime."

"Um," he says. "Right. Will do."

There are a few seconds of awkward silence, which thankfully isn’t all that noticeable because both Jill and Andy are laughing so hard.

"So!" Kelly says, deciding to get things back on track. "We were thinking of seeing either The Bourne Ultimatum or Stardust – which do you want to see? I’m totally all about Stardust, personally: cute British boys and magic and Michelle Pfieffer being totally hot and evil and Claire Danes looks sooooo pretty – like, it doesn’t get much better than that, you know? I like Matt Damon as much as the next girl, but come on, you know? And, okay, I just said ‘you know’ twice, which I totally didn’t mean to do. I promise I can talk and stuff.”

She laughs, because that’s what you’re supposed to do to show that you’re all down-to-earth and not trying to be fake to impress somebody. She’s not sure whether he gets this, though, because he just kind of stares at her for a minute.

“Whatever you want to see is fine,” he finally says politely.

“That’s so nice of you!” she beams.

He smiles back, which is sweet even if he doesn’t seem that excited. “No problem.” Another awkward silence threatens to surface, but he totally kicks its ass by asking, “So . . . do you like to read?"

"Totally," she replies enthusiastically. "Meg Cabot is my hero. And did you read Deathly Hallows yet? Oh my God, I did nothing but read all weekend. Seriously. Nothing. And, okay, you've heard of Twilight, right?"

"Um," Nicholas says, "I'm not really familiar with any of those except -- Deathly Hallows is Harry Potter, right?"

"Uh," Kelly says, trying not to look at him like he’s a crazy person. "Yes."

"I'm not a big fan," he admits, and sort of makes a face. "It seems so overrated to me. It's good that they're getting kids into reading, I suppose, but I really don't get the huge adult fanbase."

"You don't?" Kelly says weakly.

"They're children's books," he says with a dismissive shrug.

"They're good stories," Kelly protests. "Aren't good stories for everybody?"

"I guess," he says, but she can tell he’s not convinced. Part of her sort of wants to ramble at him until she can make him realize how Harry Potter is one of the greatest things ever, but something about the way he’s looking at her now tells her it’s not the best idea.

"So!" she says instead. "What do you like to read?"

"Lately I've been on a Nabokov kick," He says, then shoots a worried glance at her. "You've heard of him, right?"

"Oh, yeah, of course!" she says as naturally as she can. "Lolita. Duh."

What she doesn’t say is that she’s only heard of it because Ryan liked Nabokov. They watched both of the film versions, and either way, it creeps her out. There’s nothing pretty about a love story about a pervy old guy and a Hannah-Montana-aged girl. Even if the pervy old guy is Jeremy Irons.

“What did you think of it?” Nicholas asks curiously.

Kelly opens her mouth, not quite sure what she’s supposed to say to that without informing the guy that he’s got a sicko’s taste in reading material. Thankfully, she doesn’t have to say anything, because Andy steals the spotlight.

"I-D-K!" he exclaims, in a dead-on impression of that cell phone commercial. "My – B-F-F, Jill?"

"Ha!" Jill cries, then glances over at Kelly, her eyes pretty much watering from laughing so much. "Oh my God, Kelly, you were so right! He is hilarious!” She turns back to Andy, toying with his tie. “You are hilarious!"

"Thank you muchly, madam!" Andy says cheerfully, staring down at her hand like he can’t really believe that it’s there.

“So,” Kelly asks Nicholas, making sure to sound extra-bright. “What movies do you like?”

--

They do wind up seeing Stardust, because Andy convinces Jill it will be awesome, and you can’t really argue with three against one. Andy winds up sitting a couple seats down from her, so Kelly can’t actually talk to him during the movie or anything. She keeps leaning over to whisper stuff to Nicholas, who just sort of grunts out one-word answers and then goes back to looking bored. She can hear Andy and Jill whispering back and forth pretty much the whole time.

The movie is even better than she’d expected: it’s funny and exciting and Robert DeNiro’s totally the greatest thing she’s ever seen, like, ever (she hopes Oscar goes to see this and maybe gets some ideas, because she totally loves him and all, but he’s sort of boring), and besides, Tristan and Yvaine are so perfect for each other it’s not even funny. They’re one of those couples that start out all bickery and “I-so-hate-you!” (even though they totally don’t), which are the best types of relationships ever, usually. It’s the sort of thing that would usually remind her of her and Ryan, because bickering was pretty much their specialty (along with really good makeup sex). But for some reason, when Tristan is yanking Yvaine around on the magical chain and she’s all grumpy, what it reminds her of is Beach Day, where she was blindfolded and Andy had to lead her around.

She doesn’t really know what to think about that, because since when does Andy factor into her fictional romance comparisons?

The movie totally makes her cry at the end, in that good way where it’s too pretty not to cry. Nicholas yawns and checks the time on his cell phone again. She looks over and sees that Andy’s got his arm around the back of Jill’s chair. Which is nice, Kelly guesses.

--

“So,” Andy says after the date, and pulls Kelly’s car door open for her even though she’s the one driving. He offers his hand, which she takes as she climbs out. “Fun-fa-fun-fun night, huh?”

“Yeah,” she says, “I guess.”

“How about you and Nicky?” he asks. It’s sort of bothering her how chipper he sounds.

“Nicholas,” she corrects morosely.

“You guys hit it off?” he asks.

“Yeah,” she says, forcing herself to sound like she hasn’t just experienced the date from hell. “Totally. And it looked like you and Jill were getting along really well.”

“Oh, completely,” Andy says, grinning. “She is a stone cold fox. I owe you one, Little Snapple.”

Kelly tries to smile back. “Great. I’m glad.”

As he heads over to his car, he says over his shoulder, “Can I tell you a secret?”

“What?” she asks.

“I was kiiiinda dreading this,” he admits. The car beeps twice as he hits the unlock button on the keychain. “For no reason, because it totally rocked, but at first . . . wasn’t lookin’ forward to it so much, I gotta say.”

“You weren’t?” For some reason, she almost feels like she’s going to cry.

“No, ma’am!” he confirms.

She bites her lip. “Then why did you go?”

“You wanted me to,” he says all matter-of-factly, like that’s reason enough to do anything. He opens the front door of his car.

She glances up at the stars. They seem so bright tonight.

“Andy?” she asks, and decides.

He turns to face her. “Si, senorita?”

She stands up on her tiptoes and kisses him, before she can convince herself not to. It’s not big or romantic or anything: just this quick, tiny kiss that could even be a just-friends thing if you wanted it to. But for some reason – because it’s Andy, she thinks – it feels like just about the most important kiss in her whole life.

She pulls back to find him just staring at her, like he’s in a trance or something.

“I don’t want another Ryan,” she says, and she’s so breathless that it’s kind of hard to get all the words out. “You make me happy. Like, all the time. Not just sometimes, to the point where I think I’ll stick with you to see if maybe it starts happening more often someday. Just . . . always. Even when you talked through that one scene in the Gilmore Girls finale.”

He’s perfectly still. She’s starting to think a basilisk got him or something.

“Andy?” she says, tapping his shoulder impatiently. Nothing. Great. She lets out a frustrated sigh. “You’re not going to be all weird around me and secretly hate me now, are you?”

He blinks twice.

“No,” he says, and his voice is sort of low and husky. “Most definitely the opposite of that.”

“Oh,” she says, relief coursing through her. “Okay. Well. Good.”

“Great,” he corrects, a little fervently.

They’re just standing here, close but not touching, and for the first time that she can remember, she has no idea what to say. Andy doesn’t seem to either, which makes her feel better.

“Hey, Little Snapple?” he finally sort of rasps.

“Yeah?” she asks.

“Gimme some sugar,” he orders, a huge grin breaking out across his face.

“You’re such a dweeb,” she tells him, giggling, and all of a sudden she doesn’t feel nervous at all. She leans into him.

--

pbeesly says:
Question.

jhalpert says:
yes, mr. schrute?

pbeesly says:
Is it just me or did Andy and Kelly come in holding hands?

jhalpert says:
it is not just you.

jhalpert says:
in fact, i would go so far as to say that it’s all of us.

jhalpert says:
creed included.

jhalpert says:
which is saying something.

pbeesly says:
Kelly and Andy??

jhalpert says:
kelly and andy.

jhalpert says:
"kandy," if you will.

pbeesly says:
Jim!

jhalpert says:
at least they’re not "jam."

pbeesly says:
You do realize that they're going to drive all of us crazy right?

jhalpert says:
love's a crazy thing, beesly.

pbeesly says:
Yeah but I'm really fond of my sanity.

pbeesly says:
That's all.

jhalpert says:
what sanity?

pbeesly says:
What?

pbeesly says:
Oh, it is ON, Halpert.

jhalpert says:
aw, is that supposed to intimidate me?

jhalpert says:
cute, beesly.

jhalpert says:
very cute.

pbeesly says:
Shut up.

jhalpert says:
besides, you've survived with the knowledge of dwight and angela's secret love for like a year, and THIS is what freaks you out?

jhalpert says:
priorities, pam.

jhalpert says:
priorities.

pbeesly says:
Well at least Dwight and Angela try to keep everything secret.

pbeesly says:
This is going to be like Kelly And Andy's Extra Hyper Everlasting Love: The Musical.

jhalpert says:
maybe it'll be fun snapping our fingers in the chorus.

pbeesly says:
If you say so

jhalpert says:
i do say so

pbeesly says:
Hey Jim?

jhalpert says:
hey pam?

pbeesly says:
Dwangela.

jhalpert says:
?

pbeesly says:
Dwight and Angela. Dwangela.

jhalpert says:
oh.

jhalpert says:
oh

jhalpert says:
now, that is VERY good.



Tags: fanfiction, fic: the office, office: andy bernard, office: jim halpert, office: jim/pam, office: kelly kapoor, office: kelly/andy, office: pam beesly, the office
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